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That's Pretty Much How It Went Down
October 14, 2005
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Yep, it's true: due to the kindness of a friend (thank you Dan, thank you Christine!), I'ma headin' to BlizzCon, at least for one of the two days. And oooo... am I temped to hit the costume shops and go as either an undead mage or a troll rogue. No way I'd ever win their contest - especially not with this short of notice - but gee... it is a very lovely thought! ::sigh:: At the very least I want to go in there and REPRESENT for my Horde brothers and sisters - the trick is going to be finding weapons that don't look like ass, bigass fake ears, and some decent troll tusks that don't look dumb OR stab my lower lip into nothingness (or I can cheap out and do the rogue bandanna-over-the-face-thing - there is also that!). Any suggestions you guys have, I'm all ears... and I'll need all the help I can get!
Whew. The only other thing I'm going to say about this comic is that I honestly thought it was going to be a quick little thing, and the fucker ended up taking WAAAAAAY GORRAM LONGER THAN THAT. I love you guys and I don't want to give you sub-par stuff, so thus I am going to be seeing Serenity on Friday instead of Thursday. This is because I love you guys, see. Don't say I never gave you nothin'. ::chuckle::
If you'll bear with me a moment, I'd like to share with you something my friend Adam inflicted on... erÂ… shared with Web Guy Josiah and myself recently:
We've probably all heard the Mortal Kombat theme, right? Right. Did you know, however, that in addition to this - there was an entire Mortal Kombat album to go with it? Yes, and it is even MORE horrible than you would think. The story behind it details that:
"In 1994 Virgin US asks Praga Khan and Oliver Adams to write and produce an album for the #1 videogame "Mortal Kombat". Of course they couldn't refuse this challenge. Virgin sends them a "sega console together with the Mortal Kombat game. Oliver and Praga start playing Mortal Kombat for 4 weeks and become masters in virtual martial arts."
If that doesn't spell trouble, I do not know what does. And just look at the winning opening lyrics from "Rayden (Eternal Life)":
The kombat king, the best of the best
Just look at Rayden, he cannot rest
Our champ, solid as a rock
He gives his opponent a state of shock
I swear to GOD I am not making this up. If you imagine this makes your eyes hurt, just wait until you hear it. I must admit there is nothing quite like hearing the single line of "Scorpion (Lost Soul Bent on Revenge)" (other than "oooohoo" and the videogame SFX "GET OVER HERE!") sung by a very scary dude in an impossibly high falsetto over and over again - like "LOST soul bent on reVENGE, LOST soul bent on reVENGE." Your ears will never bleed like that again, not even for remixes of the "Hampsterdance Song."
That being said, you owe it to yourself to read all of the lyrics in a kind of masochistic "scared straight" gulag that will make you shriek with both laughter and pain. Do it once so you can say you've done it - then inflict it upon others. This won't precisely prove anything, but it's really evilly fun to foist it upon others. Just for the love of God don't ever actually listen to the music, EVER. You will be scarred for life.
But yeah. What's this? MY GOD! It's a ginormous - LINKSTRAVAGANZA!
* FIRST of all, you should all notice that I took the time to permalink Old Grandma Hardcore - the gaming grandma that will kick your ASS at almost ANY game, punk - because she is seriously the most awesome of the awesome and you all should be checking out her site daily. Everyone must give mad props to this woman - not only has she been gaming longer than I've been alive, she still kicks as much ass now as she did back when I would have been in diapers. And she's just an awesome, wonderful woman, and her grandson Tim (who handles the site and writes the updates and so on) is equally as awesome. RESPECT THE OGHC, BITCHES. Much love.
* While we're on the subject of awesome people who live in and around Cleveland, we must mention the amazingly talented Video Game Pianist, Martin Leung. At barely 19 (I believe) he's already played at the Hollywood Bowl, E3 2005, and the Penny Arcade Expo - and DAMN is he fun to watch. Download his music, but most of all download the videos, because this guy plays with proper virtuoso feeling. I give him serious props. Man... I remember plinking out the Sonic "Green Hill" theme on my piano, back in the day, and feeling so proud of myself... if I'd focused on playing what I loved instead of the gorram "Tarnatella" and stupid pieces in those insultingly-kiddy books over and over again... I'd probably still have quit, but maybe I could plunk out a wicked Mega Man II theme to this day. You think? Maybe? Aw. ::hangs head:: Anyhow.
* I'll admit, I swiped this link from Shaw Island, but that's because it's too cool not to show you the guy who made a portable NES player right around the same size (at least length/width-wise) as the GameBoy Advance Micro (and that is SAYING something!). Well, to be honest, you also have to consider the fact that the NES cartridge is hanging off of the thing while you're playing on it, which has to reduce some of the appeal, but doesn't make it any less neato. ::grin::
* WatchUsGame.com! GIRL GAMER SITE FTW! Yeah, I'm registering. JUST YOU WATCH. I will represent. And stuff. And it will be 31 flavors of awesome.
* Speaking of awesome female gamers, head on over to Heroine Sheik, and particularly read her rebuttal to the New York Times Article - whose opening line is "Note to hard-core video game players: Microsoft says it is aiming for your mothers and wives." Bonnie Ruberg, the mind behind the site, says basically "WHAT THE HELL - are you saying that 'hard-core video game players' can't be mothers or wives, or even women in general?" And the answers are: yes they are, yes they're full of shit, and dammed if she isn't going to illustrate why. Kick their asses for us, Bonnie. FEMALE GAMERS UNITE.
* Just when you thought there was no more buried treasure in the world to dream about finding - 600 Barrels of Loot Found on Crusoe Island. That means GOLD AND JEWELS, bitches. Almost makes this ninja want to be a pirate... almost. I think I'll leave the piratin' up to more capable types for the nonce.
* Oh, bah - I was going to come up with a clever limerick for it, but my brain is fried, so I'll say it outright: OEDILF: The Omnificent English Dictionary In Limerick Form. There are over 20,000 exceedingly clever limericks in there at the moment, defining everything from "!" (no joke!) to "BNP". Delightful and witty read!
* Seriously? Best costume ever - a Transformers costume that actually TRANSFORMS. Sweeeeet. Of course this has to be followed by probably the best group costume ever, but that's another story... ::laugh::
Well, it's been a hard week of working on comicness and the new site, so I'ma skive off now and play me some well-deserved World of Warcraft. Take care, be well, and PEACE OUT.
It's About Me Now,
Annie "Blue" C
Ooh, Chinese Ninja Warrior
With your heart so cold
- The Immortals
"Sub Zero (Chinese Ninja Warrior)"
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